“Sad but Successful”

I like to think successful people also think they’re not doing enough sometimes. I like to think that they talk shit about themselves too. Steve Jobs might have thought his company was shite. Ghandi could have thought he wasn’t doing enough, or Shakespeare might have thought his poems were absolutely worthless. It makes success feel more attainable when I think of the people I admire second guessing themselves. Success is always 10 seconds away when you think about it.

That said, success is any field you consider worthwhile doesn’t equal happiness. In fact, true success is success when it isn’t sought to acquire happiness. I’m not a Steve Jobs, but I’ve had enough success in my life to know that success isn’t the source of actual happiness, it’s not even close.

You’ll have heard people like Jim Carey speak about the idea that fame and success doesn’t bring you happiness. It doesn’t, and if you succeed when you’re not content with life, achievements don’t feel like achievements. They don’t feel earned.

I think people who are really happy genuinely love themselves. They like who they are, and they forgive themselves for their flaws. They don’t need external sources to validate their self-worth. They don’t need success to feel happy. Success is a side product of their own, self-generated happiness. Achievements feel good, but happiness doesn’t, and shouldn’t, depend on them, especially if you’re trying to achieve long-term happiness.

A lot of us love other people more than ourselves. That’s a nice selfless sentiment, but it’s actually detrimental to you and everyone around you. If you don’t appreciate your own value, internally, then all of your relationships are just a way for you to gauge how valuable you are. Your relationships aren’t genuine. You can’t be a good pal to others if you don’t even like yourself.

We all succeed. We all fail. Don’t let your achievements be your source of happiness, and don’t let your failures define you. Focus on generating your own happiness, and let that spur on true success. If you value yourself primarily on how successful you are, or how much money you make, you’ll always be chasing it and you’ll never be satisfied. It’s easier to become a success story if you already consider yourself a success from day 1.

G’luck.

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