Questions About The Things You’re Ignoring

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Here are some questions to refer to when you are reflecting on your relationship with yourself:


Why do you speak to yourself that way?

You know the way. How you hold yourself to an impossible standard. How nothing is ever good enough, no matter how well you do. Why do you have tolerance and understanding for mistakes others make but berate and scold yourself for the mistakes you make?

Why is that?

Is it subconscious? Is it guilt and shame as a result of centuries of Catholic control that has seeped into the way we think and how we construct morality so that every innocuous misstep is something to feel bad about? Why do you expect yourself to be perfect when you know that human beings cannot achieve perfection?

Is it something else?

Do you believe that you deserve happiness? If you don’t, is this way you treat yourself so badly? Because you don’t believe you deserve to be at peace?

Why is your head full of criticism for yourself? And why do you allow that voice to hold court, to hog the mic, to convince you it is correct?

Why do you speak to yourself this way? You wouldn’t speak to someone you love like this, so maybe it’s that you don’t love yourself?

Why don’t you love yourself?

Is that the foundation of it? Do you resent yourself? If you do, why? Is there a way to change this? Can you change the relationship you have with yourself? It takes a lot of work. Are you willing to do this work? If you’re not willing to do this work, why not?

This has been a lot of questions. The answers are hard to find. Sometimes we don’t want to address a problem we play a hand in. Because addressing this hurts.

Yet it’s important. Essential. It’s something we all need to do.

So I have one last question:

Are you willing to try?

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