The Humblebrag

Sweet merciful mother of Jesus. There is an abundance of things that are infuriating about the society we live in. On top of actual real issues, people still find the time to go out of their way to be hyper-sensitive, entitled, over-achieving, pathetically-ready-to-be offended, infants. I’m not getting into it now, I could be here for genuine pages. What I will complain about right now is the painful trend of humble-bragging, and how genuinely cringy it is.

The humblebrag, if you are unaware, is the act of disguising a brag, or boastful statement in the midst of a complaint or negative outcome. Social media, coupled with our newly developed societal narcissism have created a lush environment for the humblebrag to thrive, and it’s incredibly fucking annoying. Here’s a classic example of a real life humblebrag:
“I genuinely have no idea how I was given a scholarship to go here, I’m genuinely so stupid”

On the surface, this just looks as though the person is owning their stupidity. In reality, this was their way of letting the world know they’re on a scholarship. It’s a sly move, used usually by the same pricks who say they ‘definitely failed’ an exam and come out with an A.

Humblebrags are infinitely more annoying than normal bragging. At least with normal bragging we’re all on the same page, and even if you’re being a douche, you’re being an honest douche. I’d much rather see someone be delighted with an achievement on my timeline, rather than have to put up with superficial complaints about how terrible their priveleged and wonder lives are.

Here’s an idea. If you’re proud of something you’ve done, just be straight up proud of it. Don’t come around with your shitty complaints about your unreal life. Nobody wants to hear that, and nobody is going to enjoy you as a result. When you brag, there’s a fair chance you have a pretty big ego. When you humblebrag, you have a big ego, and you probably think you’re better than people too, which means you’re doubling down on being a relentless prick.

If you wanna brag, fire away. Don’t try and get superficial pity from people by falsely complaining just so you can mention an amazing aspect of your life, that’s just pathetic.