It Doesn’t All Have To Happen Today

This blog is a labour of love, and it will always be free. Over 1,000 people read every post which is incredible. And if just 100 people donate €2 it means that I’ll be able to continue doing all of this for another year. So if you like the work, it would mean the world to me if you considered making a donation. Thank you to everyone who already has this year. There’s no expectations, as ever, and I hope you have a lovely week. Donate here

There is also now a Thoughts Too Loud Podcast!

It doesn’t all have to happen today. I tell myself that a lot. And when other people are putting themselves under pressure, I tell it to them too. Not everything has to happen immediately. Not everything can. WE have unrealistic expectations for how things should play out.

Have you ever had a crush on someone? Of course you have. You know when you have that feeling. You don’t have any patience. You want the relationship to begin immediately. There’s this sudden explosion of urgency. You need what you want right now.

But life is long. You can take your time. While you may like everything to happen now, it is more realistic to expect things to happen slowly. This is true for your career, ambitions, love life etc.

Social media amplifies this. We see all the highlights. We see people seemingly living the dream 24/7. And although we know this to be a false display, it still affects us emotionally. We see people doing the things we want to do while we’re sat at home not doing it. And we think then, because we are not doing the thing right now, that we are letting ourselves down, failing in some way.

We look to some future where we’ll be happy because that’s when we’ll be doing what we’ve always wanted to do. But trust me, when you get to that point you’ll have moved the goalposts. You’ll have set your sights on a new goal, a new point further down the road where you’ll be happy. It will never end.

Instead, we need to find happiness where we are now. While we will always have goals to work towards, we need to be content with where we are in the process. Otherwise we work and work, all to attain a future that will never be as shiny as it appears now.

It doesn’t all have to happen today. You can take a break. You can take a breather. Social media is neither real nor important. Stop comparing your life to portrayals of other lives that aren’t real.